“What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I just be happy with what I have? Why do I keep wanting more when I already have a ‘good’ relationship?” 

If that question has been looping in your head, this episode is for you. Spoiler: there’s nothing wrong with you. You’ve just been taught your whole life that love only “counts” if it fits in the monogamy box—even if that box is crushing you.

What happens when you grow up being told your body isn’t yours, your desires are dangerous, and your worth is tied to being someone’s “only one”… and then you finally break free?

In this powerful conversation, I’m joined (again!) by Leah Carey, relationship and intimacy coach and former host of Good Girls Talk About Sex, to talk about what so many folks discover after leaving high-control environments like purity culture, religious abuse, cults, or narcissistic family systems:

In non-monogamy, being misunderstood often feels like the default—and being truly seen? That’s the exception. But finding your people truly changes everything.

In this episode of Nope! We’re Not Monogamous, non-monogamous love, sex, and relationship coach Ellecia Paine cracks open the emotional exhaustion of constantly explaining your relationships—especially to therapists, friends, or family who just don’t get it. She shares what real support actually looks like, how it feels in your body, and why tolerating your truth isn’t the same as honoring it.

Do you worry that your desires make you “too much”?Like wanting more connection, more honesty, or more love means something is wrong with you?

In this episode of Nope! We’re Not Monogamous, I’m getting all the way real about the internalized guilt so many of us carry when we crave “more” in our relationships. More connection. More truth. More you. And especially inside non-monogamy, where wanting more can trigger every insecurity we’ve ever inherited from monogamy culture.

So your mind gets polyamory—you’ve read the books, done the therapy, had the late-night conversations. But your body? It’s still freaking out when your partner goes on a date. Welcome to the nervous system’s opinion on non-monogamy.

What actually happens at sex-positive events? Cuddle parties? Consent circles? Erotic service? 👀 In this episode of Nope! We're Not Monogamous, I sit down with Jamie Love, Executive Director of Sex Positive World, to talk about the radical, healing, and totally human side of building sex-positive community.

Feeling like the “easy one” in your polycule?
Always chill, never the squeaky wheel?
This episode is your permission slip to stop shrinking for connection.

We’re breaking down what it means to disappear inside non-monogamy, why boundaries aren’t selfish, and how to recognize when your emotional self-silencing isn’t maturity—it’s survival.

Are you having the same fight over and over in your non-monogamous relationship—and wondering why nothing ever changes?

You’re not broken. You’re in a pattern. And until you understand what’s underneath that pattern, it’ll keep showing up again and again.In this episode, we’re diving into trauma loops—how they form, why they’re especially common in non-monogamous relationships, and how to start breaking the cycle for good.

You’re not broken. You just never learned how to say the hard thing without burning everything down. In this episode, I’m sharing how to actually talk about the uncomfortable stuff in non-monogamy—without losing your shit or starting a relationship wildfire.

What happens when you go from 26 years in a sexless marriage… to a full-blown sexual awakening in your 50s? This week, I’m joined by Xanet Pailet — a former healthcare lawyer turned tantra teacher, somatic sex coach, and the author of Living an Orgasmic Life.

Tired of misunderstandings, silent resentment, or agreements that leave you feeling unseen?

In this episode, we unpack the real difference between collaboration and compromise—and how building intentional, values-based agreements in non-monogamy can transform your relationships.

Do you ever feel like you’re doing everything right in your open or polyamorous relationship—and yet still crumble inside the moment your partner connects with someone else? In this honest and unfiltered episode, I explore what real self-love looks like in non-monogamous relationships—especially when comparison, jealousy, and insecurity hit hard. 

In this raw and revealing episode, I sit down with six-time Emmy-nominated TV producer Jeff Hudson to talk about his memoir Deconstructing Us: My Trouble with a Throuple. Jeff shares what it was like to navigate the emotional rollercoaster of a throuple, how jealousy blindsided him, and why non-monogamy cracked him wide open—in the best and worst ways.

Have you ever found yourself obsessively scrolling through your metamour’s Instagram, convinced they’re somehow “better” than you?

You're not alone—and it’s not just insecurity. In this eye-opening episode, we unpack the deeper roots of comparison in non-monogamous relationships, explore how patriarchy conditions us to compete, and share real tools to help you stop spiraling and start reclaiming your power.

Are you struggling to navigate the complexities of emotional safety in non-monogamous relationships? In this eye-opening episode, I sit down with Dr. Emma Smith, a licensed professional counselor and certified sex therapist, to explore the intricate world of emotional integrity and boundaries in ethical non-monogamy.

Ever wondered if you can learn to feel compersion instead of jealousy? Or if talking about opening up your relationship means you're actually ready to do it? This episode dives deep into these questions and more!

Struggling with comparison in your non-monogamous relationship? Whether it’s jealousy, insecurity, or spiraling thoughts when your partner mentions someone new—you’re not alone, and you’re not broken.

If you’ve ever struggled with mismatched desires, defining commitment with a partner, or navigating the messier side of non-monogamy — this episode is for you.

When I was invited to interview someone from Ashley Madison, I hesitated. My first instinct was judgment — but then I realized, that’s the same kind of stigma people apply to non-monogamy all the time.

Struggling to feel deeply connected in your non-monogamous relationships? Whether you're navigating polyamory, open relationships, or casual connections, meaningful intimacy doesn’t have to take hours of deep conversations or elaborate date nights. In fact, it can start with just five minutes a day.