Saying Yes to Non-Monogamy with Natalie Davis, EP. 143

What if non-monogamy wasn’t something you planned… but something you found your way into?

In this episode of Nope! We’re Not Monogamous, I’m joined by Natalie Davis, editor of Polyamory Today and author of the memoir Saying Yes: My Adventures in Non-monogamy.

Natalie shares her deeply human journey from a traditional, long-term monogamous marriage through infidelity, swinging, and polyamory, and how that path eventually led to building a chosen family that includes her partner and her metamour, all living together under one roof.

This conversation is honest, nuanced, and especially validating if you didn’t start non-monogamy feeling confident, enlightened, or “built for this.”

We talk about how safety is created over time, why early rules aren’t a failure, and what actually helps relationships evolve without burning everything down.

In This Episode, We Explore:

  • How Natalie moved from monogamy to swinging to polyamory

  • Why boundaries and rules at the beginning of non-monogamy are about nervous system safety

  • Letting go of control as trust and security grow

  • What it really takes to live with a metamour (and why compatibility matters beyond love)

  • Navigating age-gap relationships with intention and consent

  • How infidelity can become a turning point rather than the end of a relationship

  • Why non-monogamy isn’t about having less commitment, but more honesty

  • How chosen family can expand your life in unexpected ways

Where to Find Natalie

Send us a text

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Music: Composer/Author (CA): Oscar Lindstein
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Jealousy Is Shame in Disguise (And That Changes Everything) EP 142